Death Star petition rejected

We, the people, want a Death Star. That’s what over 34,000 Americans agreed to when they signed a petition to the Government in the last few months of 2012. The petition was started in November and received a response from the White House last week.   

In an era of easy access, perhaps the one domain of life the general public still struggles to gain any real ground in is influencing government policy directly. While petitioning the government, no matter what the cause, has been guaranteed by the first amendment since the writing of the Constitution, the process has been difficult and impractical until recently. 

In Sept. 2011, the Obama administration set up a website designed to get the public more involved and informed and make petitioning the government easier to complete. With the creation of  the We The People website, 2.8 million Americans have been able to write and sign petitions they believe deserves a response. 

One such petition that over 34,000 people believed worthy of the time and consideration of the President, or at least from his White House staff, was an idea shore up funds for, and to start, construction on a Death Star by 2016. In order to receive a response from the White House, this galactic solution to all defense dilemmas needed 25,000 signatures in 30 days. 

The resulting response from the White House titled, “This Isn’t the Petition Response You’re Looking For,” was written with all the expertise of a Chief of the Science and Space Branch and all the space allusions of a true Star Wars fan. 

Though the response denied the petition and Death Star as a practical defense system, it did reassure the signees that the U.S. is not lacking totally in advanced space technology.

“Even though the United States doesn’t have anything that can do the Kessel Run in less than 12 parsecs, we’ve got two spacecraft leaving the Solar System and we’re building a probe that will fly into the exterior layers of the Sun,” said Chief of the Science and Space Branch at the White House Office of Management and Budget, Paul Shawcross, in his petition response. Faith in our president was also urged as Shawcross assured Americans that President Obama knows his way around a light saber. 

The reasons for the denial included the $850,000,000,000,000,000 addition to the already out of control deficit, the administration’s stance against blowing up planets, and the fact that any piece of defense equipment built with a fatal flaw is better left in the blue-print stages. 

     While this particular petition shows a lighter side to the petition process, We The People has helped the general public get reviews and responses to over 103 petitions on topics from climate change to gun control. Currently there are 237 open petitions, each with the hopes of reaching the 25,000 signature threshold so it can be seriously considered and responded to by the Obama administration.